Haircut: FAIL

So, I thought that I would be all home-eck-ey (that's a word, right?) and give my baby his very first haircut. Daddy had a meeting that night, but no big deal. I could handle a toddler, and infant, a dog, a camera, and a pair of scissors, right? Look at how Proverbs 31 I am! I had given Mary Laine her first haircut and it was great. She sat perfectly still watching her video while I snipped a few unruly hairs and, voila, a cute, barely noticeable trim.

Fast-forward a year and a half. I try to recreate the scene. I use the same bumbo as the seat, play the same DVD for distration, and set-up the same surface. Yes, Langdon is a bit squirmier than his older sister. No, I didn't have the help of my husband to distract him if his head wasn't tilted exactly the right way. But all of that could probably have been dealt with. My one fatal error: a change in utensils. My mom has some scissors that she uses to cut her dog's hair. The ends are blunted to be sure that you don't cut the dog. Perfect for cutting your baby's hair too, right?

I started to snip the hair on his neck and behind his ears just to even it out and straighten it up a bit. Just a touch. Not too much. I looked at my handi-work and realized that it was perfect...ly uneven. What happened? So, I took the scissors and went back over it to straighten it out. Oh, no - big jagged zig-zags. Then it hit me - it wasn't me that was having a hard time cutting in a straight line. It was the scissors. While great for a shaggy dog, NOT great for a baby. So, I went to get the regular old scissors. I went back over it again and realized how my "tiny little trim" had turned into a massacre. I saw that it still wasn't even (my fault this time - not the scissors), but I had to yell to myself, "PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN AND STEP AWAY FROM THE BABY!!!" Poor Langdon! This is the result of his first haircut:

It either looks like Hitler, or like Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber. Either way, not exactly the look that I was going for! And just in time for his first birthday party and one-year pictures. Any suggestions for how to get hair to grow faster?

So much for "Proverbs 31" woman. Guess I'm Delilah instead.